There’s one type of article that appears over and over in newspapers and magazines. It concerns the differences in behaviour between men and women.

John Gray’s 1992 bestselling book, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, was based on the premise that men and women live on different planets when it comes to relationships.

Gray has now published a sequel, Why Mars And Venus Collide, which attempts to show how to improve relationships by understanding how men and women cope with life and stress.

Here are six points from the book from a woman’s point of view on how to make your man a better partner.

1. Trust him
Show a positive belief in his abilities and intentions and he will become a more caring and attentive partner.

2. Acceptance
Don’t try to improve him, accept him as he is. When a man feels accepted it is much easier to listen and give you the understanding you need.

3. Appreciation
When a man feels his efforts are appreciated he is motivated to respect his partner more.

4. Admiration
When a man feels his unique characteristics, like sense of humor and strength, are admired, he will feel secure enough to devote himself to you.

5. Approval
An approving attitude recognizes the good behind what a man does. When he receives approval, it becomes easier for him to accept a woman’s feelings and point of view.

6. Encouragement
A woman’s encouragement gives hope and courage to a man by expressing confidence in his abilities and character. This motivates him to give her the loving reassurance she needs.

They all seem to be hovering around a similar point : flatter the chap rotten and he’ll do your bidding.

I wonder for how long that would last? He’s bound to smell a rat at some stage. Probably when he finds his lady’s copy of Gray’s book and discovers she’s been manipulating him all along.

Be yourself, but be generous toward those closest to you, is Mind Matter’s superior advice.

Staying on the theme of recent posts : mind expansion and extended mind, let’s take a look at former Glasgow barber, Gordon Smith. He’s not to everyone’s taste and it requires some belief, or direct experience of his work, to get into the swing of it.

I usually buy Gordon Smith’s latest books as they are published, because they always contain rich nuggets of wisdom on all aspects of the spiritual and the afterlife.

Gordon Smith is generally held to be the most accurate spiritual medium in Britain. He started life in a lowly part of Glasgow, ran his own hairdressing business for a while, and now makes his living as a TV presenter and an author of books.

The following passage occurs in his latest volume : Stories From The Other Side.

“Our consciousness keeps expanding but because we live in a world where there are linear thought and time and space we are restricted by what we can describe and what we can understand.

“The very nature of our existence is about ripening our consciousness. So often people restrict themselves by thinking that everything has to be achieved or got over in this life. It is such an unburdening process to come to the realision that there is no beginning and no end.

“Eventually we learn to mistrust the material world because everything we hold on to ages and dies, including our bodies — a process we monitor daily. As that happens, we become dimly aware of a realm above the bodily which, strangely, a part of us already inhabits.”

Gordon Smith’s strength is that he is acutely aware of the thin veil which prevents many of us seeing beyond the linear aspects of our daily lives.

The scientific journal Science is reporting the findings of neuroscientist Dr Henrik Ehrsson who has succeeded in simulating out of body experiences under laboratory conditions.

The experiments have a lot in common with those of Dr Rupert Sheldrake, whose concept of “extended mind” is one of the more interesting developments in biological research this century. The findings seem to reveal that the mind relies on the senses of sight and touch to locate itself inside the human body.

When the connection is disrupted, whether by illness, drugs or deliberate confusion, strange things begin to happen. The sensation arises that the mind has left the body.

Ehrsson used goggles, a video camera and rods to confuse the brain and create the effect. A sitting volunteer wore goggles linked to a video camera pointing to his back. Looking through the goggles, he saw an image of his back from the perspective of someone sitting around six feet behind him. A technician then touched his chest with a rod, which was unsighted to the camera behind. The split effect then took hold.

Dr Ehrsson tried the experiment out on himself, “You really feel that you are sitting in a different place in the room, and you’re looking at this thing in front of you that looks like yourself, and you know it’s yourself, but it doesn’t feel like yourself. This experiment suggests that the first-person visual perspective is critically important for the in-body experience. In other words, we feel our self is located where our eyes are.”

This has an uncanny resemblance to Sheldrake’s experiments on extended mind and certainly supports many people’s experience of being outside their body during sleep or at unusual moments in their lives.

At this time of year many of us are preparing our bodies for the rigours of the summer season : getting into last year’s beachware, increasing stamina for all that air travel, looking good in public.

We sometimes neglect our minds though, forgetful that they need a bit of routine maintenance and TLC as well as the physical envelope.

Here’s an excellent checklist of how we might go about it :

1. Choose your direction
2. Make it happen
3. Slow down
4. Lose the negativity
5. Break your routine
6. Play to your strengths
7. Get out of your comfort zone
8. Surround yourself with inspiring people
9. Take control
10. Keep it fresh.

Number 8 might also include reading inspiring authors, watching inspiring films etcetera.

The list was compiled by Lizz Brocklesbury of www.themindgym.com